I better change my essay better by show my analysis of my topic which is all the gamers like to talk about what they want. First of all I better make my thesis more outstanding. I just glad I'm on the topic though, I was worrying that I might not understanding the topic well. I think I start off pretty in good shape, but still I have to move around or change those histories I have in beginning of the paper. The history about blog and game push my analysis of thesis too much. I had hard time finding examples because I support my thesis with just atmosphere of article and blog, need to fine confident examples on the paper.
Basically I'm intend to make
1. my thesis better
2. arrange my order of paper(contents)
3. better exmaples
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